May 18, 2011

Have Lipstick, Will Ride

Posted in Motorcycle, Spirit, Travel, Writing at 6:47 PM by moxiemuse

There was never a why, just a when. It always came down to time and desire. For me, it was both, simultaneously. Not a chicken or egg-type deal. The right time and the right amount of desire had come together at last. What am I talking about? Why, riding solo, of course! 

First, it was riding back of boyfriend’s bikes. They loved the look of me in red lipstick and black leather. So did I but it was not meant to be. Then it was a pack of friends renting mopeds on the Greek isle of Paros for our 30th birthdays. No sooner was I on the moped than I was off again, unfortunately, not upright. I accelerated too quickly, hit a curb, and fell heavily on my bare shoulder. A big ouch and lots of loud, colorful language didn’t deter me from riding with the Viper Queens, as we called ourselves. I knew someday I had to master this mechanical horse and learn to ride with confidence. The wind in my hair, bugs in my teeth, and the feeling of freedom never left me.

Years passed and the longing returned. Tired of sighing over a beautiful BMW ad and after many attempts to convince my husband to ride, I figured it was my turn. I did my research diligently – using sales brochures, browsing the Internet, chatting up sales associates, and listening intently to the stories of other riders and their bikes. Then, I signed up for the safety course in October and passed with (almost) flying colors. It was time; I was ready to roll.

In the spring of 2001, I placed my order with the happy salesman, sight unseen, and threw caution to the wind. I’ll never forget the day I picked “her” up. I stared in bewilderment as the salesman rolled her out toward me. Sparkling in the noonday sun, her shiny red and black coat made my heart skip a beat. The great mass of chrome and leather loomed so large and ungainly that I felt sure I’d drop her the minute I mounted. Alas, she held steady for me as I revved the engine loudly for all those within earshot to hear. Ah, her pipe noise was music to my ears. Wow, I thought, she’s truly mine.

My husband Jason beamed as he stood next to our friends who had come down to the dealership to witness my excitement. “She’s a beauty,” exclaimed Sandra, who was thrilled I had chosen a Suzuki similar to her cruiser. I christened her, “Vixen the Volusia”. Suzuki’s latest model was named after Volusia County in Florida near Daytona Beach where all the new models are introduced every spring. As for “Vixen”, the name brought me back to those carefree days in Greece and my virgin solo ride.

Enough posturing, it was time to take my iron steed for a spin around the parking lot. My hands were clammy, my forehead dripped from the beads of perspiration that had formed, and my ever present lipstick was starting to chap. She seemed too heavy to turn and awkward to steer at first but soon, she was like putty in my hands. She responded to my every whim. I looked at my husband as I approached the turn and mouthed, “She’s a keeper!”

Now the true test: out on the open road. Leaving the dealership in the dust, I lead the pack down rural West Valley Highway. Fortunately, the spring rains and blustery winds had died down the night before and brought sunshine for my inaugural ride. It was thrilling to feel the cold bite my cheeks. The more I rode, the more I felt Vixen and I getting into the groove.

I did not ride far that day. I didn’t need to. I had allowed pure bliss to permeate under my skin and take hold. It was a good feeling to finally feel my own bike beneath me. The sensation of freedom was indescribable yet evident on my face. Pulling up to an intersection, the driver in the next lane took a long slow look at Vixen and nodded his approval. Giddy, I smiled broadly so that he could see I was a girl with bright red lipstick. Surprised, he grinned back and waved as I sped away.

Soon, Vixen and I bonded as we travelled wherever my heart and her sturdy frame could carry us. After a few long weekend rides, I planned some week-long rides. From 2002 to 2004, I rode around the Olympic Peninsula and into the Hoh Rainforest, down to Mt. Shasta and the Ashland Shakespeare Festival, took a few ferry rides and sped along some good twisties to hang out in Tofino relaxing at the Wickaninnish Inn, and a tour through Washington and Idaho’s enchanting lakes. 2005 was coming up fast and with it, my 40th birthday. It was my husband’s 50th that year, too, and he surprised me with a two-week 4-star trip to Egypt. Wow, that was hard to top but I decided I still wanted to do something on my own. Well, not truly alone because I knew Vixen would want to be by my side. I wanted to taste the fun—just  me, my red lipstick, and the open road.

I planned to attend a conference in Salt Lake City so what better way to travel than to ride? It was my first cross-country ride–a 2500 mile loop through Washington, Idaho, Montana, Wyoming, Utah, and Oregon. I left during a downpour in mid-July. The rain and hail (yes, hail) continued unabated for three straight days. Each morning, the hotel guests marveled how I could gear up and head out in monsoon-like weather. I would always smile, apply some red lipstick, gear up with my Gore-Tex clothing, and head out. I have to admit that even I got tired at the end of Day 3 and at one point near the Montana/Wyoming state line, I swerved off the highway, dismounted Vixen, lifted my arms skyward, and shouted, “You’ve got to be kidding me.”

After getting that frustration off my chest, I endured 300 more miles of thunder, lightning, and yes, more hail. Days 4 and 5 turned me into a lounge rat, sitting in Jackson Hole drinking as much lemonade as I could get my hands on, writing postcards to disbelieving friends, and drying out. Having made it thus far, I needed a treat and the town delivered in spades. My AMEX became friends with a charming piece of bling for my right index finger, a large turtle shell Indian rattle, and a travelogue about the Navajos of the Southwest. Day 6, I arrived in Salt Lake in 110 degree heat. Talk about climate change. This called for shopping in an air-conditioned mall hunting for a new coral-colored lipstick with SPF of at least 15 that would soon make itself into my oh-so-fashionable tank bag. That’s “purse” in motorcycle lingo.

Four days in cooled conference rooms made the learning part easy so when we wrapped up, I was ready to roll home. I left at 8 PM and it was still 90 degrees. Coming from the Pacific NorthWET, that was new for me. The temperature hovered near there until I reached Twin Falls. Fortunately, I had made reservations at the Super 8 otherwise; I would have been in big trouble. Massive forest fires forced State troopers to close the main highways and everyone was forced to hole up in hotels which were booked solid. I was one of the lucky few who didn’t have to sleep in their cars that night. Vixen and I rode in companionable silence all the way to Walla Walla and our favorite grand hotel there, The Marcus Whitman. Wanting another treat but not needing more lipstick, I meandered through the town’s boutiques, partook of some local winery tours, and later, enjoyed a relaxing massage. That day was a perfect end to my first cross-country tour.

Fast forward to spring 2011, where I finally had some spare time and decided that my long-planned tour to and through the Southwest—18 days and 3400 miles—would finally become a reality. The scenery ranged from bucolic stretches of Oregon farm country, snowy Wasatch Mountains, kitschy Four Corners, tumbleweed-infested New Mexico, windy Colorado, culture-soaked Hopiland, the stunning red rocks of Sedona, and unremarkable northeastern Nevada. Vixen weathered a few lost parts on the way down and on the way up, I endured a large rock flying into my face (long story), cracking the visor in half. A requisite amount of blood and tears were the norm that day but since I had only 250 miles left, I cleaned up, applied a fresh coat of lipstick, and set Vixen’s compass for home sweet home. The last leg was uneventful and just what I needed to complete my trip of a lifetime.

The trials of the open road are ever-present yet I know when it beckons, Vixen and I are ready.

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January 4, 2011

The Sketchbook Project

Posted in Art, Spirit, Writing at 2:06 AM by moxiemuse

Logo of The Sketchbook Project

It started late last autumn when my friend Anne was looking for people to participate in The Sketchbook Project with her. I took the bait.

My creative muse was with me this November as I spent much of month working on two big projects:

* writing my first novel as part of NaNoWriMo

* participating in The Sketchbook Project (my sketchbook has just been digitized! http://www.arthousecoop.com/users/moxiemuse)

The Sketchbook Project asks you to choose a theme and I chose the most popular one, A Day in the Life. My book turned out to be more like a journal (lots of writing) than a sketchbook. I didn’t sketch a single thing. Lots of writing and collaging. But mostly writing. Things in my life that mattered. Like tea, essential oils, writing, cats, my darling husband, travel, all things Italian, and friends.

This project is an outreach effort of the Brooklyn Art Library. Each artist is sent the same blank Moleskine sketchbook. There are only two rules: first, the book must be used in some way – no sending back an empty book or a completely different book! Second, the sketchbook must stay within its original dimensions (because they don’t want to have to provide an extra suitcase just for my book while they’re touring the country).

Each book will be given a barcode so they can easily catalog it into The Brooklyn Art Library system. Once they catalog it, artists will be able to track where on the tour their book is viewed and how many times someone pulled it from the shelf – they want to make sure we can stay connected with our sketchbook!

Thousands of sketchbooks will be exhibited at galleries and museums as they make their way on tour across the country.

After the tour, all sketchbooks will enter into the permanent collection of The Brooklyn Art Library, where they will be barcoded and available for the public to view.

28834 artists from 94 countries around the world participated. The tour starts February, 2011.

P.S.

Now that this project is over, I was motivated to continue on my creativity streak. I decided not only to participate in another Art House Coop project called Photomobile, where I chose the theme, Signs and Symbols.

The Sketchbook Project also spurred me to set up a new blog for all things creative in my life. It is called http://moxiemusespark.wordpress.com/ 

Basically, a blog that is less about using words to comment about my life and more about expressing myself through pictures. More right brain, less left brain. I’m still dusting off my creative muscle but feel free to stop on by or subscribe for new postings. I’m still pretty busy finishing up my novel and then working on revising it for submitting to a literary content in mid-February so I doubt there will be a whole lot of stuff on the new blog until late February.

October 9, 2010

White Buffalo Woman: Then and Now

Posted in Animals, Books, Spirit tagged , at 1:00 PM by moxiemuse

I’ve been so fortunate to call Eve Kerwin, my friend and mentor. Her book is a mere glimpse into the fascinating and often challenging life she has experienced as the White Buffalo Woman.

I learned so much about spirituality, shamanism, the legend of the white buffalo, walk in phenomena, personal growth in spite of diversity, and walking the road less traveled regardless of family pressure and societal norms. The Awakening encompasses all these aspects and much much more. Truly a revelation of a book that honestly details the life of a modern mystic, working shaman, loving mother/daughter/sister,  generous friend, and an all-around extraordinarily talented and gifted woman. You will find that The Awakening engages you on many levels. A riveting read. I can’t wait for the sequel to learn and understand the depth of Eve’s life and work.

Here’s how it all started:

On the 10th of August 1994 in Janesville, Wisconsin, a momentous birth occurred.

This birth was heralded as the fulfillment of a 17-generation-old Lakota Sioux prophecy. A female white buffalo calf was born on a bison farm owned by the Hieder family. The calf was pure white, not an albino. This was genetically remote, later predicted by geneticists as one in hundreds of millions. The day after its birth, before news reached the press, a Lakota Sioux medicine man mysteriously appears on the Hieder’s doorstep, saying that he received a vision that a white buffalo was born and needed to travel to it. He was guided to their farm by Spirit to acknowledge the event that his nation had been prayerfully anticipating for hundreds of years.

The significance of the white buffalo for the Sioux Nation begins centuries ago on the Great Plains. A number of tribes had joined together on the banks of a river. These seven clans were cooperating out of necessity, as times were very hard. Game was scarce and they tired of warring on one another for resources. They agreed to coexist under the tutelage of one chief.

They prayed that he would lead them back to abundance and prosperity. One day, the Chief Standing Tall instructed two of his best scouts to try and locate a herd of buffalo. One located find and the subsequent hunt could lay up provisions for the entire tribe for a year. The two scouts departed camp and headed for parts infrequently visited in search of game.

After some time, scouting the horizon from a hilltop, one of the scouts noticed a strange apparition in the distance. A white globe was floating a scant few feet above the grasslands, moving slowly toward them. Their first inclination was to run, but they were riveted by the vision. As the glowing globe got closer, they could see the form of a strikingly beautiful woman within. This woman had long black flowing hair and was covered in white buckskin. She carried a bundle in her arms. The scout, who first witnessed her, recognized that she was not of this earthly domain and this was a message from The Great Spirit and he was humbled.

The second was drawn to her by her shining and pristine radiance and lusted for her physical bounty. As he approached her, suddenly a swirling cloud engulfed the scout and the vision and together, they spun wildly as if being sucked up into a summer funnel cloud. When the torrent ended, she remained floating over a pile of bones. She spoke to the remaining scout and asked that he not be afraid. For the first had improperly misinterpreted her purpose. He should return to the tribe and tell them to prepare a lodge for her as she had gifts to bestow from Spirit. He hurtled himself across the plains and returned to camp to the amazement of the elders. But they all acknowledged that this was the answer to their prayers and made preparations.

The entire tribe was assembled as they saw the same white globe of light appear on the horizon and float towards their encampment. The chief greeted the apparition and welcomed the emissary from Spirit.
She spoke, “I am the White Buffalo Woman”, and then held out her arms as she passed the bundle she was carrying to the chief. She explained the first of seven ceremonies that would provide them with a process of right action and deeds as the chief unwrapped the cloth to expose two items. A stem made of cottonwood and a bowl shaped from red stone. The stem represented the male and the bowl, the female. When joined together, and only joined when praying, the smoke of the pipe would carry their prayers directly to The Great Spirit. As long as they honored this gift and six other ceremonies that she would reveal in the subsequent few days, their peoples would live in abundance and peace.

As the White Buffalo Woman bade her good-byes to the tribe, she floated from the camp and then the same funnel cloud again appeared only this time as its winds abated, a white buffalo appeared and stood before them. It laid down, turned around, and stood up, only the color of its coat had changed to black, then again, it changed to red, then once again as it changed to yellow and finally, back to white. The bison strode off and the voice of White Buffalo Woman could be heard by all, saying that she would return one day, when the world was at peace. Her owners named the white buffalo calf born in 1994, Miracle. Thousands have visited Miracle. Amongst them, many Native American elders, and even the Dalai Llama have physically witnessed her and acknowledged this prescient message to mankind.

After Miracle’s birth, the essences of White Buffalo Woman began to intertwine with the energies of Eve Kerwin, a former cosmetics model from Stamford, CT. When White Buffalo Woman speaks, Eve becomes the conduit for different spiritual guides who come through and assist her in this healing work. The sum total of all these energies is The Holy Spirit. In the beginning of each session, what people experience coming through Eve is a coded, vibrational, energetic dialect: a Universal Telepathic Core Language. Eve believes that the work of the White Buffalo Woman, the true gift that comes through her, is for many people to consciously understand their mission here and their life’s purpose. The process is an awakening and unlocking of Universal Truths, that when applied to their life, balances their bodies: mental, emotional, physical, and spiritual. This new and fresh perspective has life-altering potential, not only in interactions with others, but their physical circumstances as well. While Miracle fulfilled the physical aspect of the prophecy of the White Buffalo Woman, Eve Kerwin, through the shamanic tradition, is carrying on the spiritual aspect to truly complete the work of this wisdom teacher.

September 3, 2010

Association for Tarot Studies

Posted in Spirit at 5:11 PM by moxiemuse

Association for Tarot Studies.

July 25, 2010

The Bluebird of Happiness continues its journey with me

Posted in Animals, Spirit at 12:25 AM by moxiemuse

When I told my bluebird stories to a confidante recently, she gave me her original glass Bluebird of Happiness from Terra Studios.

I was thrilled because this was the 3rd bluebird that appeared in my life in 2 weeks.

I always pay attention to the power of three, because 3 in numerology is all about communication. I tend to think of things coming in 3s as confirmation of whatever that thing is. In this case, the bluebird is a messenger of good health and contentment, love, and joy.

My story continues…

Yesterday, I attended the Bellevue Festival of the Arts with my friend Anne.

As we meandered amongst the artists’ stalls, I started telling Anne about the bluebirds coming into my life. I was at telling her about the second one (that appeared after my call with my friend Randy). I was mentioning that Randy was asking me whether I’d ever seen pounamu (New Zealand jade) and wouldn’t you know it, we were standing in front of the booth of a New Zealand jewellry artist and he had pieces made of pounamu!

Then, we walked across the aisle to the booth of mixed media artist Vicki Fish and her Bluebird of Happiness piece! It had wings, ephemera, and a few subtle and not so subtle references to the bluebird.  The Bluebird piece I reference in the link is different than the one I saw last night but it is a close approximation.

Some interesting coinkydinks, dont’cha think?

Today, I found a few more items that caught my eye.

Firstly, this article talking about some late-night TV show signoffs that included both the poem, High Flight, and the Jan Peerce song, Bluebird of Happiness. What is interesting to me about finding this article talking about these two items together is that when I saw the second bluebird, I *knew* my deceased father had something to do with it. My father experienced very little joy throughout most of his life so somehow sensing that he was sending me these bluebirds while I was in the midst of a difficult situation at work meant so much to me. The poem, High Flight, was my father-in-law’s favorite poem and he asked that it be read at his memorial service. Soooooo, having references to items associated with my father and father-in-law in this website is also a big sign for me.

Then, I was looking for ephemera on the web to create my own rendition of a Bluebird of Happiness shadow box when I came up on book with that title in eBay no less–Ariel Gore’s Bluebird: Women and the New Psychology of Happiness.

Speaking of the lovely song about the Bluebird of Happiness, I thought I’d share the lyrics by Art Mooney. Enjoy!

The beggar man and the mighty king
Are only different in name
For they are treated just the same by Fate.
Today a smile and tomorrow a tear
We’re never sure what’s in store
So learn your lesson before it is too late.
So be like I
Hold your head up high
Till you find the bluebird of happiness.
You will find
Greater peace of mind
Knowing there’s a bluebird of happiness.
And when she sings to you
Though you’re deep in blue
You will see a ray of light creep through.
And so, remember this
Life is no abyss
Somewhere there’s a bluebird of happiness.
The poet with his pen
The peasant with his plow
It makes no difference who you are
It’s all the same somehow.
The king upon his throne
The jester at his feet
The artist, the actress
The man on the street.
It’s a life of smiles
And a life of tears
It’s a life of hope
And a life of fears.
A blinding torrent of rain
And a brilliant burst of sun,
A biting, tearing pain
And bubbling, sparkling fun.
And no matter what you have
Don’t envy those you meet,
It’s all the same, it’s in the game
The bitter and the sweet.
And if things don’t look so cheerful
Just show a little fight,
For every bit of darkness
There’s a little bit of light.
For every bit of hatred
There’s a little bit of love.
For every cloudy morning
There’s a midnight moon above.
So don’t you forget
You must search
Till you find the bluebird.
You will find peace
And contentment forever
If you will . . .
Be like I
Hold your head up high
Till you find the bluebird of happiness.
You will find
Greater peace of mind
Knowing there’s a bluebird of happiness.
And when she sings to you
Though you’re deep in blue
You will see a ray of light creep through.
And so remember this
Life is no abyss
Somewhere there’s a bluebird of happiness.

July 11, 2010

The bluebird of happiness

Posted in Animals, Philosophy, Spirit, Work at 12:07 AM by moxiemuse

AKA "My bluebird of happiness"

First sighting: July 2, ~ 8:30 PM

Second sighting: July 10, ~ 3:20 PM

At the time of each sighting, I was on the phone with people I befriended during our 2005 trip to Egypt. A significant transformational event as no other in my life. I wonder what two sightings in a week will bring? My inner knowing is telling me it has to do with my work so stay tuned as there is a stirring afoot.

Significance of the bluebird

From Kala at http://www.exploreyourspirit.com/blog/category/kala/

The solar and lunar eclipse cycles this year (full moon eclipse on June 26 and solar new moon eclipse on July 11) will have the greatest effect on the cardinal signs of Capricorn, Aries, Libra and Cancer, especially those born early in the sign. For Capricorns, early in the sign would be those with December birthdays. These eclipses bring their strongest energy three days before and after the actual event dates, which has the July eclipse effect being felt beginning on the 8th. The after-effects of an eclipse continue to be felt for another six months.

The current powerful eclipse cycle marks a time of great change, and brings to a head decisions of priorities between home and career.

Eclipses bring things to a head and sound the clarion call to action. While many fear the swift changes that eclipses bring, in the long run they can be seen as helping to shake people from situations where they needed to make a change and were stalling for one reason or another. Eclipses open your eyes and leave you little room to continue to live as you were.

The eclipse in late June was an especially difficult and challenging period for Capricorns and Cancers and may have had them second guessing their decisions. The new eclipse delivers a more soothing energy in comparison to the one in June.

  • A good omen, considered to bring happiness, contentment and joy.
  • The bluebird visits a human and reports back to the gods, similar to the phrase, “a little bird told me”.
  • Prosperity, good luck, and the bluebird is the only bird considered not to have a dark side.
  • Symbol of changes and passages, bluebirds indicate that those who previously attempted to block our progress will now find themselves blocked and hindered.
  • Bluebirds are the magical color of the East and enhance the throat chakra and creative artistic impression.

 

From Ted Andrews, Animal Speak, book re: Bluebird

Keynote: Modesty, unassuming confidence and happiness

Cycle of Power: Winter and summer (changes of seasons)

Although once common, they are now quite rare. This is often a reminder that we are born to happiness and fulfillment, but we sometimes get so lost and wrapped up in the every day events of our lives that our happiness and fulfillment seem rare. When bluebirds show up as a totem, it should first of all remind you to take time to enjoy yourself.

Bluebird males are entirely blue, although occasionally there will be some warm reddish tones on the chest as well. Pay attention to the colors and where they are located. This will provide some insight.

Blue is associated with the throat chakra and creative expression. Blue is symbolic, so ask yourself what blue means to you personally. (NOTE TO SELF: ‘Got’ that Dad looked best in blue because of his pale blue/grey eyes although he had red in his eyes because of his glaucoma.)

The idea of the bluebird being symbolic of happiness is fairly recent.

This bird always has a plaintive song and a modest, unassuming appearance. Its shoulders are hunched up when perched, giving an impression as if ready to dive. This can be symbolic of a need to work hard and play hard. Are you trying to shoulder too much responsibility? (NOTE TO SELF: Have been complaining to Jill the trainer and Dr. Oh the chiropractor about my odd pain at the top and side of my shoulders.)

To the Pueblo, bluebirds are considered winter birds because they descend to the lowlands with the snow and cold during that season. This transition from winter to summer is dramatic in the area of the western home of the Pueblo. It is a transition from great coldness to summer heat.

This is symbolic of a passage, a time of movement into another level of being. Specifically, it is connected to the transformation of a girl into a woman. This, of course, has connection to human fertility and a new confidence and happiness in coming into your own.

Bluebirds are gentle and unaggressive, although very scrappy when threatened. Their homes usually have an entrance facing South, the direction for awakening the inner child.

If a bluebird has come into your life, look for opportunities to touch the joyful and intrinsically native aspects of yourself that you may have lost touch with.

June 16, 2010

A phrase to make your day

Posted in Spirit at 1:31 AM by moxiemuse

Those who love you are not fooled by mistakes you have made or dark images you hold about yourself. They remember your beauty when you feel ugly; your wholeness when you are broken; your innocence when you feel guilty; and your purpose when you are confused.

~African Saying

June 6, 2010

Are you searching for an alternate universe, too?

Posted in Philosophy, Spirit at 6:54 PM by moxiemuse

Moonlight window of an alternate universe

“Reality is considered a leading cause of stress for those who choose to be in touch with it – a silent form of crowd control believed to be thought up by our space chums. But it just too confining and I needed to let go of something – so decided that reality was going to be optional.” –Lily Tomlin

Reality has to be agreed upon – it cannot hold us from imagined lives unless we collude with the myth that there are no other choices –agreeing with others that this is as good as it gets.

This is where my oft-used byline comes in: Embrace the world in your own genuine style.

If a genuine style means not accepting “reality” for reality, then embrace it, I say. “Reality” is just how you perceive what is going on around you, shaped by years of conditioning. Change the conditioning, change the perception. The changes will occur not from the mental realm but in the heart space. Start there.

I’ve been having issues with my eyes now for some time, trying different drops and ointments to ease the pain of dry eyes. It dawned on me that on some level, I was choosing to keep my eyes closed when I woke up every day; almost like wanting to stay in a dream state so that I wouldn’t have to “see” certain things. Without the assistance of the drops and ointment to keep my eyes hydrated during the night, my tear ducts dried so much so that upon waking, my eyelids were stuck to my pupils and opening my eyes was painful because cells off of my pupils were being torn off each morning.

If eyes are said to be the windows to one’s soul, then what were mine saying?

A distorted reality was being projected. Clearly (no pun intended), mine were reacting to the “reality” that is my life and they were not liking some aspects of what they saw. The opthamologist doesn’t have a cure for dry eyes, offering the drops and ointments as a panacea, which isn’t treating the problem at its core. The core, as I “see” it, is that I need to experience a new, healthier reality because the current one isn’t working. This is where realizing (making real) an alternate universe and embracing it in my own genuine style, needs to take front and center.  

Here’s to alternate universes for us all!

May 17, 2010

Letting go

Posted in Spirit at 2:46 AM by moxiemuse

My new desktop wallpaper 🙂

I’ve been working on an instructional video for work on/off for about a month now. It was not something I absolutely promised the Marketing team I would do yet when they came calling after the successful reaction to my first one, I thought it wouldn’t be too big a deal to do another one. Why I thought it wouldn’t be, I don’t know but that was then. Turns out, it has been a struggle from the beginning. One thing after another to block the project from getting off the ground. That’s when the resistance set in. The drudgery. The resentment. The length of time it took to get started and all the things leading up to it just added to my frustration and procrastination. The anxiety built up from the pressure of letting someone down.

Today, just when I thought I might be on the home stretch, the program I use to create the videos just stops working. At first, I’m convinced I can get it to work. As time passes and my problem-solving tips aren’t helping, I am, once again, incredulous that I’ve reached yet another stumbling block.

And then, I stopped.

I realized I’m going against the flow. I’m not listening to what’s really happening here.

Then I asked myself, “What are the consequences of not following through?”

Not much.

So why struggle?

I let it go and found that spot of bliss in me that I go to when I need to realign my attitude.

I decided to find some inspiration and ease myself gently and kindly out of my perceived mess.

Here’s what I found:

“…and what is it you plan to do with your one wild and precious life?
…and when it’s over, I want to say: all my life I was a bride married to amazement.
…Instructions for living life: Pay attention. Be astonished. Tell about it.”                        ~ Mary Oliver

“Whatever happens. Whatever
what is is is what
I want. Only that. But that.”                  ~ Galway Kinnell

March 11, 2010

How to invest 3% of your income

Posted in Spirit at 5:29 PM by moxiemuse

I receive Neale Donald Walsh’s daily post, “I Believe God Wants You To Know…” and I don’t always have time to read it everyday but today, I decided to read it. I really believe in what he’s saying here so I thought I’d reprise it as a post on my blog.  

From Neale:

On this day of your life, dear friend, I believe God wants you to know…that you must invest three percent of your income in your self-development in order to guarantee your future. Brian Tracy said that and he was right. I know you really want to take that class or that seminaror that spiritual growth retreat, but you think you can’t afford it. The truth may be that you can’t afford not to. Try following your highest impulse. Your mind rarely invites you to explore things that are worthless — and your soul never does. You know exactly why you got this message today.

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